Proverbs 27:6, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”
If you were in a bad place with God and headed towards hell would you want a godly friend to tell you? And if you were so self-deceived and truly convinced that you were right but were actually wrong in God’s eyes and the only way God could open your eyes would be to use a friend to hurt your feelings would you trust those wounds? I pray your answer to both questions is, “yes.”
Often times we believe that God values our “feelings” above all else. Meaning, we can sometimes think that our feelings are the most important thing to God. However, this is not true, there are many things that God values over our feelings. For example, God treasures His Gospel over our feelings. He would rather the Gospel be preached and we feel harassed, and mocked then for us to remain silent and feel respected (just read Acts and study the life of Paul to see what the first disciples suffered emotionally to preach God’s Word), 1 Corinthians 4:9-13.
Also, God values righteousness more than our feelings. The Bible teaches us that God is like a Father who would rather discipline us through emotional trials so we might live more righteous lives than to allows us to feel good with an undisciplined soul.
Hebrews 12:6 says, “… the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” Both words “discipline and chasten” by very nature infer discomfort and temporary displeasure. Ofcourse, God is not an abusive, pain loving, moral monster- He is a loving Father that only uses discomfort and temporary pain as a “last resort.”
On the other hand, kisses, warm fuzzies, and “good feelings” can be deceptive. Take for example Judas; he didn’t really love Jesus when he gave him a kiss. The kiss was a signal to the Roman soldiers to identify Jesus, it meant nothing of value to Judas, otherwise he wouldn’t have betrayed Jesus. However, when Jesus openly rebuked Peter and called him, “Satan” He did so in genuine love, Matthew 16:23. The temporary public embarrassment and wound to Peter’s feelings showed that Jesus loved Peter enough to hurt his feelings because He didn’t want him to perish.
Therefore, in your friendships aim to be the kind of friend that speaks the truth in the love like Jesus- even if it hurts feelings. And be open to corrections from your godly friends- even if your feelings get hurt. For it is far better to have your feelings hurt and be right with God than to be kissed and feel good headed for eternal destruction.
- Repent for the times you may have been corrected by a godly person but were offended because your feelings were hurt.
- Ask God to give you good friends who care enough about your well being to tell you the truth even if it emotionally hurts.
- Be the kind of friend who shares the truth in love.